Falling in Love

the moment of starting falling in love is sweet.
or should i say the moment when a guy keep treating you 

so good, so good
for a new relationship feels so nice.

but no one ever knows that after the few weeks of starting to know each other
will be like 

HELL!!!

you may feel still continue feel sweet
but,
i was never feel so sweet

all my relationship was never better than each past relationship

i feel so sad
therefore if one day someone ask me
"am i happy with my present relationship"

my ans will be
" i am happy during the starting of the relationship"

i duno, may be is my problem!!
i sometime personally do feel i dun have any love
to give out for the another person.

i very sad, suffocating
with all this!!

feels so lonely when i realize i dun have a person 

to talk with about 

my happiness, my life, my sadness, my disappointment, my success,
other than my friend beside me.

i wish to have another person different status from my friend

would share all this with me
and he will share his with me .

all i hope was just a simple relationship,
simple relationship

JUST simple RELATIONSHIP

is all i had been wishing for .

and i have been 

waiting

♥ 

waiting

♥

waiting 

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

♥until i found him ♥

What i Want!!

i dun think a normal relationship is what i want.
  i feel the loneliness is not normal loneliness
duno since when i have this kind of loneliness.

who will be my doctor to cure this loneliness??
 i still can't find the HIM that belongs to Me.
i dun even given a chance to have find for him.

i dun feel any love in the previous relationship.
     all i felt is just the emptiness in my life.

                               

                            loneliness

2nd of 9Sept 11

today, i thought i've slept until 1 in the afternoon alrdy,but when i look at the clock, it was only 11.30am.
normally during this raya week holiday i slept very late and wakes up very late too..i woke up around 12.30 or nearly to 1 pm


today,mummy go to work already. daddy appeared in the news paper again ..hehe ..
im right now sitting in front of my dearest laptop, updating my blog, chatting in facebook and update my best romance book list. i take out all the books and put in on my table rite beside my laptop then i start updating.


in case who ever reading my this post that never ever read before romance novel,i suggest you grab one and read now. not that because inside is all about steamy reading materials, but the story is nice..
the way the writer wrote it,describe everything,every place during that year...i will be so different from any novel you've read.haha..that is my opinion..hope you'll find another feeling than me


nothing much to write down today since my life is so much a bored life..
well, another thing now in my mind, my head is about my final exam.
i haven't even start studying now when all my friend started to study a lot...
what am i suppose to do ....OMG!!

Me and Gina(the malaysian char bor)

          Today i've spent the day with my friend Gina Bhalan who called her self the Malaysian Char Bor.
i helped her starting her own blog and she named the blog of her's as the Malaysian Char Bor, this really gives me blast laugh!! What a unique title i ever heard.
Well, i went to her house is actually because of returning her steamy reading materials and get new one to read.
Today i felt quite tiring, and i duno why. im easily tired today. i feel sleepy too..LoL..

          Thought that i would spend my whole 1 week holiday with my wife a.k.a my greatest friend in the whole universe,but who knows she is now in money eyes now,she rather work and dun even try to get some time to study for her final that is after this Raya holiday week. Speaking of which,i dun even start study for my final too. Even is on the 20th of Sept, but still is near and im worried that i dun even start studying at all.
         
           Haiz...today my temper is a bit of out of control. i've been shouting towards my brother in the morning, and after i came back from my friend Gina's house. would it because of i just got my period back??..
No idea...haha..

No idea what've got into me ..

to be honest, i've don't know what've got happened on me .
im moody,im emo,im sad,im depressed

i hate this feeling.

recently, my dai yi mah always not on track,make me so dam sum.
go see doctor,doctor say maybe is my hormone got problem.
haiz....why is this kind of things happen to me ???
he oso say if i put on weight and the situation keep on i might going to the path of diabetes man !!!
DIABETES leh, dun play play o ...
it's a long life term of suffer leh >< walao,give me die i oso dun wan get this kind of sickness...

i never intake sweets,sweet carbonated drinks,any sweet stuff, even stopped my junk food so so long ago.
suddenly tell me that i might have this DIABETES call me go jump building i oso will jump de loh rather than get this kind of sickness.

now the only thing is wish,hope and pray to god for me not getting this sickness...><

im sad and emo  is because from fb i known a guy who have heart diseases,it is the third final stage le ..
he can go at anytime,the more i think about, the more im sad.

although i dun know him as well as my greatest friend, but still im sad because of his sick ...
i dun like bad things happen arround me.
i hate funeral, i hate all this negative things...

who can help me??drag me out of this kind of situation ...